But It Don't Feel OK!

John Ballom uses his childhood experience with domestic violence during the mid-sixties to craft a story that speaks through a young character, Johnny.  This book is appropriate for young readers to assist in beginning conversations around domestic violence.

Johnny is a young boy who loves his family and has a strong attachment to his mother.  The apartment building where Johnny resides is a place of warmth, laughter and good neighbors, but it's also a place of fear and anticipation. 

He experiences the physical abuse of his mother at the hands of the “man of the house”, his sibling’s father.  Though Johnny doesn’t understand when or how the abuse begins, he has grown to sense the anguish it causes his mother.  It’s a difficult time where he is trying to understand anger, why his mother is treated so badly at times, and his feelings are affected.

His mother tries to give him hope in the midst of despair by offering that “it’s okay”.  But, Johnny is old enough, and has experienced the drama of the abuse enough to know that, “it don’t feel okay”.

The goal of this book is to have adults become more aware of the impact that domestic violence has on children; and to encourage children to freely speak about their pain related to the fear and helplessness they experience when impacted.